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Dating vs Courting

Casual Dating

Casual or recreational dating is defined as dating where both individuals have no interest in a long term relationship, dating that simply has fleshly pleasures in mind or dating with absolutely no interest in marriage. God’s Word certainly tells us to look for one godly mate or “1 + 1 = 1.”

Men, if you want to show your insecurity right away, start telling a new lady about all of the women you are dating. She could care less! She wants to know if you are interested in her and her alone. Women, if you want to get rid of a guy in ten seconds, tell him about all of the other men you are dating. No one wants to be compared to anyone else or stand in line to compete for them. Juggling acts belong in a circus, not in relationships.

Both men and women want relationships where each feels special to the other. We actually sabotage our own quests for great relationships by bringing in too many choices. We get on internet dating services, “spends our nickel and takes our chances” reading false profiles and as Dr. Karen Miller, psychologist, says, “We let out egos choose our mates. Our egos are dead set against us ever finding a mate because our egos tell us that no one is good enough for us.”

Dating vs Courting 

You will not find the word dating in the bible. You will find the word courting. Courting is when two people decide to date each other exclusively, taking time to know each other without interference from outside love interests. It is a time of learning about the other, deciding on their strengths, weaknesses and if there are deal breakers such as the other being ungodly, no relationship with God or church, being addicted, unhealthy life styles and whether they can respect you and actually learn to love and cherish you. This takes patience, persistence and lots of prayer. Keep God in the center of your relationship.

Practically every psychologist, whether secular or Christian, will tell you to become friends first. Not all friends will become your soul mate but wouldn’t you want your soul mate to be your best friend? Friends have no ulterior motives in a relationship. They are not shooting for notches on the bed post. Friends just hang out together, feel very comfortable with each other and do not have to follow the protocol of calling on a certain day for a date. Friends can be spontaneous and easy in their relationship.

Keep this verse in mind: (LB) Proverbs: 16:9 “We should make plans, counting on God to direct us.”

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Author: Ron Mumford  June 10, 2014  10:00 am

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